Put Your Galleons Where Your Gob Is
by catfish101
Summary: James Potter is about to get his revenge on Albus Severus and his best friend Iris Jackson. Ever since first year, the two have been betting on everything and everyone. And James is sick of it, so he sets up a plan that ruins what Albus and Iris knew about their friendship. But when James starts feeling guilty, he tries to fix it. But can he put his galleons where his gob is?
1. Introduction

_/ **trigger warnings:** may contain mildly obscene language and slight mature content later on /_

 **Introduction  
**  
Much to everyone's assumptions, twins weren't exactly the same in every way.

That could definitely be said for Iris and Arizona Jackson. Whereas Arizona was more the studious one, Iris hardly ever did her homework. Although Iris dressed less feminine than many girls her age, Arizona loved to wear floral patterns and girly colours. Iris got into arguments and didn't shy from conflict, Arizona would merely walk away from any confrontation. The only similarities were their appearance - the blonde hair and dark eyes, similar facial features and comparable voices. Another difference is that Arizona surrounded herself with people - she was the 'pretty' one, the 'popular' one.

Iris stuck with none other than Albus Severus Potter - a boy in her year whom she had known since their first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. They had met when seated next to each other in History of Magic and Albus had made a bet a galleon that at least five people would fall asleep - Iris proceeded to argue with him saying that eight would.

Iris was right.

Ever since that one moment in History of Magic, Albus and Iris have been making bets with each other on other peoples lives - exchanging money whenever one would lose to the winner. They found entertainment in betting and many said that the two may have had gambling problems. Granted, it was Arizona who said that to Iris almost every day, but the two continued betting.

Unbeknownst to Albus and Iris, James - Albus' older brother - had gathered the family members and close friends to all make bets on when the two partners in crime would finally realise their love for each other. When Albus discovers his siblings and cousins talking about it, he can't help but tell Iris and everything they thought about their platonic relationship fell apart. But is it for the worse or the better?

 **Gryffindors: James Sirius Potter | Hugo Weasley | Iris Jackson  
Slytherins: Albus Severus Potter | Roxanne Weasley | Lucy Weasley | Scorpius Malfoy  
Ravenclaws: Lorcan Scamander | Arizona Jackson | Rose Weasley  
Hufflepuffs: Lily Luna Potter | Lysander Scamander  
Graduates: Fred Weasley II | Molly Weasley II | Victoire Weasley | Dominique Weasley | Louis Weasley | Teddy Lupin**

 _/_ _ **an:**_ _hey guys, so this is just an intro to the story which is basically just an extended description - the prologue comes next. i'm going to leave it up to you guys to see the next gen as your own personal favourites for their faceclaims but for my two OC's , Olivia 'Chachi' Gonzales is used for Arizona Jackson and then Maddie Hasson as the main female protagonist; Iris Jackson. hope you guys like the story :) /_


	2. Prologue

_/ **trigger warnings:** mildly obscene language /_

 **Prologue  
**  
"Guys, come on," James Potter tugged on his little sister and cousins' arms, dragging them to the Room of Requirement. James wore that signature look on his face that screamed mischief. Rose knew instantly that James was up to something and, of course, she didn't like it. James was always planning and pranking and joking around - regardless of his middle name, she was sure as hell that he didn't have a serious bone in him.

"Where are you taking us, James?" his year-younger cousin, Rose, asked. "I have homework to catch up on."

"You? _Catch up_? As if," James rolled his eyes.

"She has prefect duties at night, James," his fourth year sister, Lily, mimicked his eye-rolling. "Rose can't do a crap-load of that every night."

 _"Lily!"_

"What?"

"I don't think Aunt Ginny would be happy with that language!" Rose chastised. She had always been the most responsible one out of the Weasley-Potter clan. Especially when it came to the adults' rules and the fact that none of the younger ones followed them except herself.

"Take a chill pill, Rose," James continued tugging the two of them, "All she said was crap. She's fourteen, you know."

"Fifteen this year," Lily reminded.

 _"James!"_

 _"Rose!"_

"You're supposed to be her older brother and role model," Rose continued to go on about James' irresponsibility until he stopped outside the now-appearing door.

"I think it's a little too late to start acting out of character, Rosie," James said, smirking, "Unless you believe that people should change their personalities for the benefit of others, but I think that's a bit superficial, don't you?"

James left Rose astonished as he entered the Room of Requirement, Lily giggling as she followed after him.

"Looks like he got you there, Rose," Lily indicated for Rose to follow into the mysterious room which now looked a lot like the living room back at the Burrow.

Of course Rose didn't mean it like that. James had completely twisted her words, as per usual. He was the most mischievous one and it annoyed the hell out of her. Not that she didn't love him, it's just that sometimes his pranks and manipulations went too far and Rose couldn't help but resent that part of her older cousin. Even with age, he didn't seem to mature and it had surprised her the most when he had been appointed Head Boy at the start of this year.

Proceeding into the room, she sat next to Arizona Jackson. Although Arizona surrounded herself with a group of human Barbie and Ken dolls, Rose couldn't deny the intelligence that radiated from the Ravenclaw in her year. There had always been a slight rivalry between the two for the top grades in the year and no matter how hard either tried, they'd constantly get equal marks. What confused Rose, at that particular moment, was why Arizona was here as it seemed that the only people here were from the Weasley-Potter clan, excluding her cousin Albus.

Now that she looked around, Rose noticed that Scorpius Malfoy and Lorcan and Lysander Scamander were present as well. What was James planning? Why wasn't Albus here? And if she was questioning why Albus wasn't present, she might as well wonder where Iris Jackson was as well.

"Everyone here?" James called, which quieted down the minor population of students. "Okay, so I have called you all here, as the eldest of our so called crew, to discuss the lives of two people. Those two people being Albus Severus Potter and Iris Louisa Jackson."

"Why?" Roxanne, the fifth year Slytherin, spoke up.

"Why what?" James asked sarcastically, "Why do you think, Roxy?"

"Oh, I don't know, James!" Roxanne exclaimed, her voice dripping with scepticism.

"You told us Jack-shit, James," Lucy, another fifth year Slytherin, said, "What do you expect?"

"It's not like most of us give a fuck on what you have to say anyway," Arizona spoke up, not looking up from her freshly painted nails.

"Does anyone actually care for their language in here?" Rose mumbled to herself, but her incoherent mutters didn't go unanswered.

"Nope," Arizona smiled sweetly at Rose, finally glancing around the room.

"Just tell us what you have to say and then let us get back to our own business," Scorpius - Albus' best friend, apart from Iris, of course - snapped. "Some of us actually have lives. Just because you call us all here and we came doesn't give you any reason to think that we won't just get off our asses and leave because of your irrelevant bullshit that no one cares about."

Rose never understood how Scorpius and Albus got along. Her cousin wasn't exactly the most polite boy of the century, but he wasn't flat out rude like Scorpius was. Although Scorpius didn't believe in the pureblood supremacy that his family once was incredibly known for, didn't mean that he still wasn't as obnoxious and big-headed as her father had described Scorpius' father - Draco Malfoy - when they were at Hogwarts together. Still, none of that had stopped Rose from having the biggest crush on Scorpius.

"Maybe if you lot let James speak," Hugo, Rose's little brother in his fourth year and Gryffindor, said loudly, "You'd see that his points are actually not a load of _irrelevant bullshit_ , as you so eloquently put it, Malfoy."

Much to her dismay, Rose knew that her brother had an aura surrounding him - he had the natural authority that their mother had and Rose more than wished that she had inherited it too, yet no matter how much she attempted to influence others with her extensive knowledge people just found her annoying and pushy. She proceeded to give Hugo a pointed look for his language, though he only shrugged with a humble smile.

"Thank you, Hugo," James nodded appreciatively at his little cousin. "We're here because Albus and Iris seem to take great entertainment on our lives and others. It's bloody annoying and I'm kind of sick of it, are you?"

The room seemed to emit mumbles of agreement as James continued his speech - he had also inherited his father's natural authority which insanely irritated Rose as that sort of power is incredibly useful in life, still and all, James used it to manipulate people for his pranks and joking ways.

"The two seem to have banter over betting on people," James resumed, "So why don't we make a bet on them?"

"Okay, number one; don't ever use the word _banter_ ," Arizona said, clearly irked by James, "and number two; you are not placing bets on my twin sister. Yes, we might not get along like you all seem to do, but it's not like we completely dislike each other. If you want to make bets, I suggest you do it behind my back, or better yet; not at all because Iris and Albus do it for fun, you're doing it out of spite and maliciousness towards your little brother and his best friend on account to the fact that they know which decisions you're going to make before you even think about making them. And you clearly don't like not being under control just as much as I don't like being in your presence - which says a lot. I advise you to stray from this half-witted attempt at revenge before someone gets hurt by your manipulation because as much as you may think you're being exploited by Albus and Iris for the past six years, they do it as a _game_ and you are therefore wrong. You're being petty, so whatever ludicrous nonsense you're planning, leave me out of it."

Before anyone could say anything else, Arizona had left the Room of Requirement without hesitation. As much as Rose hated to admit it, Arizona had a very good point. What were James' motives for this so called bet? What would they be betting on?

"What would we be betting for?" Lily questioned - having the same thoughts as Rose - with a suspicious look on her face.

Lily was used to James attempting to undermine Albus, but maybe this time he was going to far. She knew as much as the next person, but if it came down to nastiness, Lily wouldn't take part. She wasn't sorted into Hufflepuff to even things out with the houses for her family - she genuinely was good and just.

"We'd be betting," James paused, Roxanne and Lucy now tapping their feet on the floor for a drum roll effect, "on when Albus and Iris will finally realise that their alleged platonic friendship is so much more than that. We'd be betting on when they'd fall in love."

James grinned that signature grin, waiting for everyone's reactions.

"Who raised you?" Lorcan - a Ravenclaw in Lily's year, and close family friends to the Potter-Weasley clan - asked, a mildly disgusted look on his face. "Because it sure as hell wasn't Ginny nor Harry."

"How do you sleep at night?" Lysander - Lorcan's twin, and Hufflepuff classmate to Lily - had the same look on his face that his brother had. "Because if you do, demons probably posses you in your dreams."

"What's wrong with my idea?" James' grin faltered.

"You can't force people to fall in love, James," Lily rolled her eyes at her idiotic brother. "It's a natural process that happens because it happens, not because it's easy to manipulate."

"That's the beauty of it though, Lils," he replied, spreading his hands out. "Albus and Iris are already in love; they just haven't realised it yet."

"I'm agreeing with you, Potter - James that is," Scorpius said, "The way Albus talks about Iris - it's excruciating to listen to at night. _'Me and Iris did this today ... Me and Iris did that ... She's amazing ... She makes me laugh ... She's so smart, but she doesn't use her intelligence like Arizona does but I bet if she did, she'd be smarter than even Rose ... She has great skin ...'_ They might as well get together with a push than never get together and resent it for the rest of their lives."

"Not that I disagree that Albus and Iris should be together," Rose paused, ignoring the fact that Albus thought that Iris - someone who puts no effort whatsoever in anything to do with school - was or could be smarter than her, "I don't think placing a bet behind their backs is going to do anything."

"That's where you've gone wrong, Rosie," James said, "I haven't finished explaining _Operation Make Alis Happen_."

"Who's Alice?" Lysander asked.

"Alice Perretti in fifth year?" Lorcan added, the twins looking at each other in confusion.

"Not Alice," James rolled his eyes, "Alis - A-L-I-S. A combination of Albus and Iris' names."

"I vote to change that ship name to avoid confusion," Lorcan suggested.

"All in favour say I," Lysander supported his brother's decision. 'I's' could be heard around the room as James frowned - he thought that Alis was a good ship name.

"Any suggestions?"

"Albis."

"Irus."

"Jackster."

"Pottson."

"Selouisus,"

"Bless you."

"No," Rose said, shaking her head, "That's my suggestion. _Operation Selouisus_. It's a combination of their middle names instead of their first or last because the others could evoke suspicion with the way they sound - it's more discreet this way. Also, ship names are usually the first names or last names - who would guess the middle names?"

"Sometimes, Rosie," James said, "I wonder how you weren't in Ravenclaw."

"Ravenclaw?" Scorpius smirked, "I wonder how you aren't a Slytherin with that deception and resourcefulness."

"Don't insult my baby cousin like that," James gasped playfully.

Rose flushed, "Just finish explaining, James."

"Okay," he rolled his eyes, "The way to actually get them together, just hint things - be complete delinquents. Hey, get them to go out with other people so they get jealous for all I care. Put flea in ear - suggest little things - make things happen. Now, we proceed with when you think they'll get together and how much money you're betting, but I only just announced it. So owl me whatever you want or just come tell me after you've decided. You guys may go now because, as Malfoy said, you young teens actually do have lives."

"You may be the oldest of us, James," Lucy said, "but you're the youngest _mentally_."

Before James could rebut, everyone was already leaving. Of course, the last to leave were Rose and James, himself.

"We're stepping into a morally grey area here, James," Rose said wearily. She didn't know what to think, to be honest. Of course she wanted her cousin and his best friend to be happy - and yes, she did think they'd be happier if they were romantically involved whilst keeping their best friend status - but was this the right thing to do? Manipulate them into situations that might hurt them? Things that could pull the two apart instead of bring them closer? Rose didn't know what to think.

"It's not _grey_ , Rosie Posie," James grinned as he made his way towards the door which would lead to the corridors, "It's filled with rainbows and hearts. Red and pink and all lovey-dovey sappy-crappy colours." He grinned once more before leaving Rose standing in the middle of the room, nervousness etched upon her face.

"Red's usually associated with danger!" She called after him, but Rose knew that no one was there to hear her warning.


	3. Chapter One

/ _**trigger warning:** mild swearing /_

 **Chapter One  
**  
It had been a strange day for Iris.

Her best friend's cousins and siblings and family friends had been looking at her oddly all throughout the day. Even her own twin sister was! The only person who hadn't been acting any differently than usual was her best friend; Albus Severus Potter. He remained the same loud mouthed yet not flat out rude best friend he always had been. Posleymalderson (the Potters, Weasleys, Malfoys, Scamanders and Jacksons altogether) crew had been giving the pair pointed looks all day, it was as if they had nothing better to do other than stare. They had a look on their faces as though they were trying to decide something. Maybe they had an inside joke that didn't exactly seem funny but not interesting enough to share. It was pissing Iris off to be frank; why weren't they acting normal? The crew were acting suspicious, and Iris didn't like it. Not at all.

"Five sickles that if we ask Posleymalderson why they've been acting like utter weirdos - more than recently if I'm honest with you - around us, they won't say anything and think we're crazy," Iris uttered to Albus as the two sat in the Great Hall with the rest of the fifth years and a few seventh years who were studying for their OWL's and NEWT's.

"Wait, what?" Albus asked a little louder than it was meant to be. Unfortunately, Al had a knack for not being able to whisper or speak quietly. This caused many people to be weary of Albus seeming as he could so easily blurt out anyone's secrets accidentally and not be able to control the volume of his voice.

"Shh!" hissed the librarian, Ms. Campbell, who was on duty to cover the study period on Fridays. There was no doubt that she loathed Iris and Albus - especially since he was naturally loud. She frequently called them "rowdy hooligans who have nothing better to do than disrupt my library."

"How have you not noticed?" Iris ignored Ms. Campbell.

"Noticed what?"

Another thing about Al was that he was the most oblivious person you could ever meet. Whether someone fancied him or if a teacher was staring at him whilst he was having a conversation in a lesson, he just didn't notice things. The amount of detentions he's received across the last five years for sheer disregard of his own surroundings could nearly rival his older brother; James' who received at least one every day for the last six years.

"Our entire friend group have been giving us the strangest looks for the past three hours, Al," Iris said in a blatant tone. She and Al had been best friends since their first year and his obtuseness still surprised her the most of times.

"Ahh," he said, his eyes widening in realisation, "I get you now."

"Yes, Al," Iris nodded with a fake sympathetic smile on her face, "Now that I've told you, you get me."

"Enough of the attitude Miss. Sarcasm," Albus laughed, causing Ms. Campbell to hiss their way for the second time. "You know me, oblivious as fuck."

"Right," the shrill tone of Ms. Campbell rang out, echoing through the Great Hall causing practically everyone to gaze in Albus and Iris' direction and sigh - they were all used to this by now. "I've had enough of you two for one hour, I refuse to last another with your loudness and crude language. Get out."

"This isn't a punishment!" Iris called to the librarian on the way out as Albus pulled her along, "The further we get away from you is a reward!"

"Detention Miss. Jackson!"

"Like I give a shit!"

As soon as the two had completely left the Great Hall, they burst into fits of laughter - this was a usual thing for Iris and Albus; annoying Ms. Campbell until she just chucked them out, and sometimes they even bet on how long it'd take before they were thrown out.

"No, but, seriously," Albus said has his laughter died down, though his breathing was still rapid, "what do you mean about Posleymalderson?"

"Godric, Albus, how can you not see it?!" Iris placed her hands on the side of his face and shook him slightly.

"You know me," his speech was altered slightly for his cheeks were fiercely pushing against his jaw, "I don't see things like other people usually do."

"Okay, well," Iris let go of Albus, who was now massaging his face, "next time we're grouped with any of them in the Great Hall or our common room or in lessons or even just passing them in the corridor; just look at how they're looking at you."

"You do know that even if I try, it's not going to work."

"That's why I hate you."

"Nah, you don't."

Iris sighed dramatically, "I know."

It wasn't until lunchtime that Albus began noticing what his best friend was going on about. Whilst he and Iris conversed and betted on how quickly Davey Mulligan would chomp down his meal - a bet which Albus won three sickles for - he noticed the calculating stares that his fifth year cousins, Lucy and Roxy, were shooting them from the Slytherin table. And then, Albus caught his little sister, Lily, and their family friend, Lysander Scamander leering at them from the Hufflepuff table. It seemed the only ones who weren't giving the two odd glares (from Posleymalderson, that is) were his cousin, Rose, and Iris' twin sister, Arizona - both of whom were sitting at the Ravenclaw table (Rose sitting with one of her study buddies and Arizona actually being a member of the house itself). Though, he did notice the two rivals glancing at each other as if they were having a heated discussion with their eyes; Albus passed it off as if they were merely checking on how the other rival was doing, some sort of arch-nemesis shit. That is until the two stood up simultaneously and then left the Great Hall together; he once again passed it off as competition stuff.

Arizona Jackson didn't not like Rose Weasley, she just didn't like her either - she was an insufferable know-it-all with a superiority complex; just like herself. Neither of the two girls liked to fail whether it be academically or socially; it merely wasn't an option. Despite this, Arizona thought that Rose could definitely use a little help in the social aspect of things, but she wasn't going to be the one to give it - she wasn't exactly going to aid her rival in becoming a better version of herself. One thing she did, in fact, not like about Rose Weasley was that she was a complete lamb when it came to her family - she followed their decisions regardless if she disagreed and even if her opinions got shot down, she wasn't one to fight for herself; she didn't stand up for herself and that was one of her flaws socially. One thing Arizona did like about Rose Weasley was that they understood each other on different aspects other than socially, which is how she and Rose ended up in the Courtyard after a conversation of facial expressions.

"What are they all up to?" Was the first thing to come out of Arizona's mouth as the two breathed in the crisp October air. Albeit the fact that Arizona and Iris weren't as close as the rest of Posleymalderson, she still didn't think that invading someone's personal life was a one-hundred-percent moral thing - especially when it was her twin sister's personal life.

"Basically," Rose started hesitantly, and then began the story from when Arizona left until when everyone else was dismissed from the gathering only for Rose to sit there contemplating if what they were doing was actually O.K.

Arizona didn't interrupt Rose once, she listened to what she had to say and envisaged what could come from it all. On one hand, her twin sister could fall in love, (or realise her love, as the rest of them put it), - a feat which she hadn't fulfilled yet. On the other, it could ruin a friendship that had been blooming for six years and ready for more to come. And yet, Arizona couldn't help but feel a little giddy at the thought of said blooming friendship blossoming into something that could potentially be so much more for Iris and Albus.

"I'm _definitely not_ betting on this." Arizona said firmly, a nod of the head and pursing of the lips - Rose looked down; Posleymalderson were going to kill her. " _However_ ," Rose looked up as Arizona said this with an impudent smile, "I won't tell Iris nor Albus - not that he and I converse regularly, but that's beside the point - and I will certainly be helping you all get them together."

Rose and Arizona grinned at each other as they began discussing different tactics - she would take Albus and Arizona would take Iris, of course. They chose not to push the pair together but to hint at feelings - ask if they ever _would_ want to get together and hopefully make them question if they _could_ get together without it being completely weird and utterly incestuous. The two girls shared their worries about it being questionably principled and how _Operation Make Selouisus Happen_ could potentially break Iris and Albus, and so Rose decided not to bet on it either - she was finally taking a stand, albeit a small one, but a stand for her own opinions nonetheless.

Iris couldn't believe her eyes when she saw her twin sister and Albus's closest cousin gallivanting back into the Great Hall giggling gregariously as if they had been besties since childhood. When the two noticed Iris staring at them aghast, they shushed each other and began giggling even more as they sat down at the Ravenclaw table.

"What the bloody hell was _that_?" Scorpius Malfoy had joined Iris and Albus at the Gryffindor table from the Slytherin one - something which Albus did regularly.

"If I'm being completely honest," Iris leered at the two Slytherins who sat across from her, "I don't even want to know - the results would probably be terrifying."

"Anyone want to enlighten me on how _Rose_ and _Arizona_ are getting along without pulling each other's hair out?" Hugo Weasley asked as he sat next to Iris - he had just come from Chess Club and happened to glance upon his older sister and her rival who were still bubbly from laughing so much.

"You tell us, Hugo," Albus spoke up before shoving pizza into his mouth and swallowing instantly as though he didn't even need to chew, "She's _your_ sister."

"That's what he's probably afraid of," Iris laughed, "if she becomes like Arizona - one of _them_ \- then he's going to have to live vicariously through his older sister."

"Just like you and me, Al," James clapped a hand on his younger brother's shoulder as he was walking by and overheard the conversation, "You just can't handle my insane popularity and living in my giant of a shadow."

"The only reason your shadow is giant is because of your giant of an ego," Scorpius rolled his eyes at James - obvious dislike laced in his voice and on his face as the eldest Potter child became apparent in the conversation. Iris, Albus and Hugo laughed at Scorpius' comment only to have James blow a raspberry at the three sixteen and one fourteen year olds.

"Well aren't you the King of Maturity," Iris anointed, her tone dripping with mock and a sweet smile playing on her lips.

"If you hadn't noticed, Iris," James voiced, "I'm seventeen, which means that in the Muggle world, I'm still legally a child so I don't have to be mature. Not just yet." He crossed his arms and pouted childishly, playing along with the joke - something James was no stranger to. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to go do some immature stuff to mature people."

Translation: James was about to go prank some of their teachers.

"He irritates me to no end," Scorpius spoke instantly as James disappeared, "How _are_ you related, Albus?"

"I'm still pretty sure I'm adopted, so," Albus trailed off as the others chuckled at his comment.

"Guys," Rose had appeared at the Gryffindor table.

"Hey Stranger," Scorpius grinned as she sat down.

"Tell us if the separation anxiety from my sister gets a little too much, okay?" Iris mimicked Scorpius' tone and Rose rolled her eyes.

"Ha-ha," the sarcasm was evident in her voice, "You're all hilarious."

" _Wit beyond measure is a man's greatest treasure_ and _sarcasm_ is a form of _wit_ ," Albus gasped playfully, "You're one of _them_."

"I actually came here bearing good news, but if you don't want to hear it," Rose shrugged and raised herself slowly as she trailed off in a light voice only to be dragged back down by Scorpius as he, Iris, Albus and Hugo protested. She thanked her lucky stars that she had worn her hair down today for she could feel her ears heating up at the contact she had with Scorpius. She cleared her throat a little before practically singing, "The first Hogsmeade trip tomorrow."

"Godric, finally," Hugo sighed in relief before running off to his fourth year mates to give them the good news.

"Al, Iris," Scorpius addressed the two specifically, "Will _you two_ be going _together_ tomorrow?"

"Why _are you_ speaking _like that_?" Albus copied his Slytherin friend's tone, confusion on his face and clouding his mind.

Rose couldn't help but chortle along with Iris - notwithstanding that they were laughing at two completely different things. Iris was laughing at the mockery whereas Rose was laughing at how indiscreet Scorpius was being.

"That reminds me," Iris suddenly stopped laughed, "Why are all of Posleymalderson constantly giving Al and I the weirdest looks recently?"

Rose and Scorpius glanced at each other - looks like he wasn't the only heedless one.

"What do you mean?" Rose questioned in a light voice.

"She means why is everyone acting odd?" Albus looked between the two.

"We're all acting normal, Al," Scorpius frowned, and Albus being Albus believed him - not only was he oblivious and loud but he was also gullible - but Iris didn't believe either of them for a second.

"Right," she trailed off, sneakily receiving five sickles under the table from Albus who had lost the bet they made in their study period. "But yeah, we're going, aren't you two?"

Rose froze as Scorpius fumbled over his words.

"I didn't mean _together-together_ ," Iris chuckled with a small grin, "I just meant in general."

"Oh, well, yes," Rose finally opened her mouth, "Of course, who isn't?"

"Everyone from first and second year and the people who don't have permission?" Albus suggested, obviously not noticing the rhetorical question.

"You're a moron, Al," Iris placed her head in her hands as she giggled uncontrollably which caused Rose and Scorpius to join in.

"Well, duh," Albus said and then frowned, "but why now specifically?" This only caused the three to laugh even more at his expense. "You know what? I hate you all!"

"Nah, you don't," Iris grinned toothily, her eyes meeting Albus'.

"You couldn't even if you tried, mate," Scorpius rolled his eyes as he glanced at the pair who were laughing all in their own world.

He and Rose looked at each other with knowing looks - their best friends belonged together - but what they didn't expect was for themselves to also fall in love on their mission to complete _Operation Make Selouisus Happen_.


	4. Chapter Two

_/_ _ **an:**_ _hey guys, just a few things before the chapter – I want to thank the three reviewers who've definitely boosted my confidence for this story & give links to Polyvore sets!_

 _ **Guest:**_ _thank you for being the first reviewer and writing something so lovely c:_

 _ **gr8rockstarrox:**_ _I'm sorry, I don't ship Scorily! If the fic wasn't an Albus/OC, Scorbus would be the other pairing if that helps haha – thank you, I'll try and make Hogsmeade as much fun as possible c:_

 _ **anon:**_ _thank you so much for reviewing and because it was such a great review, I'll add more of Albus' POV c:_

 _So I know that you can't link to anything outside of FF so just copy-paste these after the homepage link of Polyvore after erasing the_ **/cgi/home** _:_

 _ **Iris:** pygwygi_iris/set?id=195608143_

 _ **Arizona:** pygwygi_arizona/set?id=195608208_

 _ **Rose:** pygwygi_rose/set?id=195608238_

* * *

 _/ **trigger warnings:** obscene language and hints of mature themes /_

 **Chapter Two**

Finally, the first Hogsmeade trip.

Albus had been waiting for this for a month and a half – he hated being cooped up in the castle constantly. Yes, he played Quidditch and could easily go practice on the pitch, and yes he could go visit Hagrid or even just walk around the Black Lake; however, nothing was able to compare to the feeling of striding down the village of Hogsmeade, already feeling the warmth of butterbeer dripping down his throat or the knowing smile creeping up on his face when they would visit the Shrieking Shack and mutters of ghosts and ghouls met his ears. But most of all, he couldn't wait to just chill out and not have teachers down his throat about NEWT's, (which were just under two years away so why did he have to care so much right now?), and get away from the family drama that seemed to follow him - no matter how much he tried to stray away from it - not to mention the fact that, plainly, he could hang out with his best friend.

And yet, before he could even do that, he managed to get dragged into said unavoidable family drama.

"He's a scumbag, Lil!"

"You don't know that, Roxy!"

"I bloody well do, otherwise I wouldn't be telling you how much of a smarmy little shit he is!"

"He _is_ slimy, Lily."

"Oh come on, Lucy - like _you_ would know!"

"What the _Hell_ is that supposed to mean?"

It seemed that Kyle Lucien, a fifth year Ravenclaw, had asked Albus' little sister out to Hogsmeade and Roxanne and Lucy were having none of it. Albus remembered back in his fourth year - Roxanne and Lucy's third - the same boy had taken Roxanne out on her first date only to steal her first kiss and then proceeded to never owl or talk to her again. He was notorious for this and as he got older, his physical actions delved deeper than just a kiss when it came to stealing firsts from girls. Albus knew how much it hurt Roxanne - he was pretty sure that it was that particular moment when she felt her first heartbreak that she became the headstrong take-no-shit Slytherin she was today. However, after that, Roxanne became cynical and he'd be damned if he let some self-righteous arse define the rest of his little sister's romantic life like he did his cousin.

So when he caught his three family members having a full blown argument on the day of the Hogsmeade trip in the middle of the Great Hall with everyone, (including the teachers), about who Lily was to and not to date, he couldn't help but intervene.

"It means that you have absolutely no say in this seeming as you have _no_ experience with _anyone_ much less Kyle," Albus was shocked that these mean words would come out of Lily's mouth so harshly - she'd never had a bad word to say about anyone let alone any members of her family. Roxanne put an arm around her fellow Slytherin cousin as Lucy held back tears.

"Guys," Albus strode towards the three girls, "what the Hell's happening right now? Fighting over a _boy_? _Really_?"

"We're not fighting _over_ a boy," Roxanne scoffed as she gave her younger cousin a scathing look, "Believe me, the day I'd fight someone over a boy - never mind it being _Kyle Lucien_ \- is the day you and Iris confess your love for each other."

"So never," Albus deadpanned though a little confused - but he chose not to dwell on it, "And that's not even the point."

"Well then if you're so wise, Al," Lily crossed her arms, her eyebrows raising and a humourless expression on her face, "what _is_ the point?"

"The point is, Lily," he paused before gasping out quickly, "there's no Universe in which you'll be going on a date with Kyle fucking Lucien."

"Thank you!" Roxanne grinned as she spread her arms out with a victorious look on her face. Lucy smirked at the semblance of rage that surrounded Lily as Albus said this.

"You do know that you can't actually physically stop me, right?"

"You do know that I can actually physically punch the git in the mouth, right?"

"Who are we punching in the mouth?" Iris had appeared along with Rose and James, both of whom looked just as interested as Iris was. I mean, who wouldn't be with the sight they were at that particular moment - Albus ready to throw his fists in any direction, Lucy who looked a little scared at his actions to say the least, Roxanne with her positively triumphant demeanour and Lily with her very red, very angry face. Not to mention the noise they were making, especially with Albus' resounding voice in a reverberant room such as the Great Hall which had astounding acoustics.

"Kyle Lucien," the four chorused.

"Why?" the three newcomers synchronised.

"Because he's a fuckboy."

"Because he asked Lily out on a date."

"Because he actually likes me."

"Because he's an unhinged sex-zealot with little to no self-control."

"That's stretching it a _bit_ ," Iris scrunched her face at the exaggeration, "don't you think, Rox?"

"I think she got it spot on, personally," James voiced, giving Lily a stern look as if he were about to give her a telling-off, "Come on, Lily, don't be so naïve. You were there second after Luce when that arse broke Roxy's heart - granted you would've been third if the first thing Fred did after hearing about what happened was to go see his baby sister instead of putting Lucien in the Hospital Wing - but that's beside the point."

"He's no good for you, Lil," Rose placed a comforting hand on her younger cousin's arm who merely shrugged it off.

"How do any of you know what - or who, for that matter - is good for me or not, huh?" Lily shook her head and stormed off to the Hufflepuff common room.

"I'm done trying to help her," Roxanne laughed humourlessly, "She doesn't want our help then she's having none of it."

"She can go cry to you guys when he breaks her heart," Lucy stalked off with Roxanne after saying, "because we'll have no sympathy."

Albus couldn't help but agree a little with his Slytherin cousins - they had all warned her of what was to come but did Lily listen? No. But it wasn't like Albus wasn't going to comfort her and support her decisions - even if they were moronic ones to which he would voice his opinion of and see where she goes from there. The four left standing all looked at each other worriedly before heading to the Gryffindor table to discuss what had just happened.

"We can't let her do this," James shook his head before saying, "No - we can't let _him_ do this to _her_."

"We have to stop this," Albus agreed with his older brother, "She's making a huge mistake with this one."

"Exactly," Rose spoke up, "It's her mistake - it's hers to make."

"I'm sorry, did I just hear you right?" James looked at Rose, disbelief and astonishment written all over his face, "You want your baby cousin to be perved on by some prick who can't keep his hands to himself?"

"She's not saying that, James," Iris rolled her eyes, "Don't be so melodramatic."

"I'm not being melodramatic."

"What exactly are you both saying then?" Albus raised his eyebrows at Rose and Iris - he was rather confused to say the least.

"You can't keep her hidden from the brutalities of this world forever," Iris responded.

Upon seeing the still-confused faces of her cousins, Rose clarified, "She can't go through life without making mistakes. And we know you want to protect her but the world doesn't work that way - if she doesn't do it now, then it'll happen in the future and its inevitable and unavoidable."

"And it hurts like a bitch," Iris continued, "but you know then to not go for the infamous player of the school."

"And you would know this how?" Albus asked - he didn't have any recollection of Iris dating anyone, so what could she say about this?

"Lyall Ives, he was a sixth year when we were in fourth," Iris explained, "same ages as Lily and that bloody Kyle Lucien."

"How'd that work out for you?" James asked sceptically.

"Pretty well seeming as I haven't had my heartbroken since I was fourteen," Iris smiled triumphantly.

"Come on, guys," Rose rolled her eyes at the two boys with a smile, "Look at Iris - and Roxanne for that matter. They're both headstrong and make calculating decisions, maybe Lily will turn out like them from this."

"I'd rather not have our little sister become a cold hearted bitch," James said with a joking smile forming on his face.

"I'll take that as a compliment, thank you very much," Iris laughed as the four made their way to the carriages for their trip to Hogsmeade.

James said his goodbyes and went off with his seventh year mates and Scorpius finally joined them after James' departure. Albus, Rose and Iris filled Scorpius in on what had happened in the Great Hall and surprisingly, he agreed that Lily was free to make her own decisions and if she didn't make mistakes now then she'd only be dodging the inevitable until it caught up to her.

"How romantic would it be if Lily was that one special girl to Lucien's bad boy-ness and he changed for her?" Rose smiled with a far look in her eyes as she voiced this in the carriage on the way to Hogsmeade. Albus, Iris and Scorpius looked at her as though she was in need of Madam Lennie's help in the Hospital Wing.

"Crap like that doesn't exist in real life, Rosie," Scorpius rolled his eyes, "It's all in books and films and creates a false sense of what life could be like and would be like if you went for the so-called bad boys but it just ends in tears and binging on food that isn't good for you."

"But look at Elliot Maine and Jessica Hayes in James' year," Rose replied determinedly, "They've been dating a year now and she had one of the worst reputations before Elliot."

"She still does, Rose," Scorpius countered, half-laughing, "She cheats on him every chance she gets - which is a lot. She's always in the common room with a different boy and Maine knows this but he thinks he can be the one to change her but she's just a bitch with no remorse when it comes to this."

Before Rose could argue back, Iris spoke up with an amused smile as she looked at the two, "Face it, Rose - things in films don't exist in real life. Bad boys and girls turning good before they turn thirty and realising they've wasted their whole lives fucking about? Doesn't happen. Falling in love with your best friend after years of sibling love? Doesn't happen. Seeing a stranger across the room and knowing full-well that they are 'the one'? Doesn't happen. Whatever cliché plot line you can come up with, you name it; it doesn't happen."

"Well," Rose said in a high voice, "falling in love with your best friend _can_ happen."

"It's a bit weird," Albus shrugged, "Like, imagine me and Iris - how bloody weird would that be?"

"Gross," Iris laughed along with Albus, "I don't even want to imagine."

Scorpius and Rose looked at each other with smiles that didn't quite meet their eyes - they were smiles that said _this is going to be harder than it looks_.

For the rest of the ride, Albus couldn't help but wonder. He wondered about how this had been the third time in the last two days that someone had mentioned thinga about him and Iris - first Scorpius when he asked if the pair were going to Hogsmeade _together_ , then Roxanne with the little comment earlier and now Rose mentioning falling for your best friend, not to mention the odd looks from Posleymalderson. This was a strange occurrence for Albus; he for once wasn't being the oblivious one, he was putting the pieces together and, to be honest, he was a little anxious to discover what was going on.

"It kills me how different our fashion sense is."

Iris, Albus, Rose and Scorpius were finally in the Three Broomsticks pub, sipping on butterbeers when Arizona sat down next to her sister with the four along with her friends.

"Then why are you sitting with us?" Iris looked at Arizona with a questioning look on her face.

"What's wrong with me sitting with my twin sister and her buddies?" Arizona asked playfully, placing her chin in her hand as she rested her elbow on the table.

"There's nothing _wrong_ with it, per se," Scorpius said stiffly - he wasn't a fan of Arizona and her friends, "It's just unheard of."

"Seriously though, Iris," Arizona said, a mock-scolding tone in her voice, "It actually hurts to look at you in your clothes."

"I don't really seek for your approval in the wardrobe department, Ari," Iris laughed with a roll of her eyes, "Nor any department for that matter."

"I guess the grunge look kind of suits you," she replied, pursing her lips, "I just wish you'd let me dress you."

Iris merely scoffed and took a sip of her butterbeer. She didn't think that what she was wearing was that bad. She wore a black tie front T-shirt, black jeans, black Chelsea boots with a heel and a military green bomber jacket. Okay, maybe it was a bit grunge, especially with the dark lipstick - but it was her style and she wasn't Arizona. Her sister wore beaded chiffon burgundy blouse, a dark denim skirt, light brown ankle booties and a light cream trench coat.

"You know the only time she lets you dress her is if she's going on a date or if there's some fancy ball," Arizona's friend Isabelle Weydon laughed and then scooted closer to Scorpius who she had sat beside - she was practically obsessed with the Malfoy boy and he couldn't have felt any more opposite.

"At least Rose dresses somewhat normally," Kathy Morris put in, kind of judging what Rose had worn that day which consisted of a patterned A-line green, grey, black and white dress, a black denim jacket and wedges of the same green on her dress.

"I think Iris looks great just the way she is," Zach Mason spoke up, a small smile on his face. He was sat at the end of the table and made eye-contact with Iris who's cheeks heated up at the compliment. Iris thanked him while Arizona rolled her eyes - Zach had always had a mini crush on her twin sister and if Iris turned around and started liking him then it would come in between the plan to get her and Albus together. But then she noticed the small frown Albus had painted so slightly on his face and Arizona thought that maybe this would be the perfect way to get Albus jealous and for him to admit his feelings for Iris.

"I don't like him," Albus muttered to Scorpius as the rest of the crew chatted away. "He's shady."

"Maybe it's because he's showing interest in Iris and she's showing it back," Scorpius suggested as he heard Iris laugh at something Zach had said.

"No," Albus shook his head, "I just think there's something off about him, I don't know what it is."

"It's called jealousy," Rose inputted as she joined their conversation instead of the Ravenclaw's plus Iris, "People generally feel it when the person they like is flirting with someone else."

"I'm not jealous," Albus exclaimed with a shake of the head, "it's like when I want to stop Lily from making stupid decisions like she did with Kyle Lucien - it's brotherly."

"Whatever you say, Al," Scorpius shrugged with a simper.

"Seriously," Albus lowered his voice so that Iris couldn't hear - which was a difficult feat for Albus with his naturally loud voice, "What's with everyone recently? I know I'm obtuse but I'm not an idiot."

"There's nothing going on," Rose denied and then, "We just want you to be happy."

"I am happy," Albus said with a confused look on his face - something which was becoming a frequent thing for him. He looked around the table and noticed that two people were missing; "Where did Iris go?"

"She went to Honeydukes with Zach," Arizona answered with a taunting tone and a tight smile. "Like a date."

"A _date_? With _him_?" Albus remarked, "Since when does Iris date?"

"Since third year when Ronnie Wilks took her out on her first date," Kathy answered as if Albus was five years old, "Do you not pay attention to your best friend's personal life?"

"Do you not remember her boyfriend last year?" Isabelle questioned and laughed as Albus shook his head, "She went out with Damon Kingsley for five months, how do you not remember this?"

"To be fair," Rose interjected, "Iris isn't one to display her affections so publicly."

"How many boyfriends has she had?" Albus asked curiously.

"Three," Isabelle answered, "But, that's only if you count Uriah Reese."

"Why wouldn't you count Reese?" Albus was scared to hear the answer.

"They didn't exactly date," Arizona said in a light tone, "But they did things people who date do."

He couldn't believe his ears - since when was Iris so romantically - and ( _sexually_ ) involved with boys? When had this happened? How did he not know about it? Why hadn't she told him? Since when did they not tell each other things? Albus had so many questions.

"So you all knew about this," Albus started, "and I didn't?"

"It wasn't a secret, Al," Scorpius shrugged.

"How did I not see that my honorary sister was _active_?" Albus asked himself.

" _Sister_?" Kathy laughed, "You're telling us that you're _not_ in love with Iris?"

"No!" Albus stood up as he exclaimed this, "Why does everyone think I like Iris like that? Is it not possible for two people of the opposite sex to be friends without there being a stigma?"

"We're not saying that," Rose disclosed, "It's just the way you two are."

"Well it's not," Albus shook his head and left the Three Broomsticks with his friends and the Ravenclaws calling after him.

Strolling through Hogsmeade, Albus processed what they were all chatting about. He and Iris were best friends, he didn't like her as in fancy her and the same for her otherwise she wouldn't be on a spur-of-the-moment-date with Zach right now. They had known each other six years now and they'd never even thought about the possibility of them dating. It just wasn't conceivable for him to think of her as more than a sister.

As he walked past Madam Puddifoot's, he saw Lily and Kyle Lucien sharing a piece of chocolate cake. She looked happy - maybe he needed to trust her judgement more. As she had said earlier - what did any of them know what or who was good for her? As long as he didn't make her feel a fool like the rest of the girls that had fallen for his charms like Roxanne, he was okay with it. Well, not fully, but that's just him being an overprotective brother. So why didn't he feel like that after the guys had told him about all of Iris' romantic and sexual experiences; maybe it was the fact that it was such a shock. But it shouldn't be, right? Iris was a person, she was only human - she could do what she wanted. As per usual, he chose not to dwell on it and continued back to Hogwarts.

Iris didn't return from Hogsmeade until after dinner - she and Zach forgot about the time and had missed the carriages so they proceeded to walk. Upon entering the common room, she saw Rose, Arizona, Albus and Scorpius sitting by the fire. She wondered why the three non-Gryffindors were present but that thought subsided when Arizona asked how it went with Zach.

She told them all about how they had been in Honeydukes trying free samples, went to Zonko's to check out their new material that definitely could not rival Weasley's Wizard Wheezes and then visited the Shrieking Shack. It was a classic Hogsmeade date, and it couldn't have gone any better.

"He's funny and kind and smart," Iris gushed - something Albus had never witnessed of his best friend, "He's so great."

"Who?" Samuel Wiley, one of James' friends from seventh year asked.

"Zach Mason," Arizona answered.

"Top lad," he nodded and walked off to the dormitories.

"See," Iris smiled, "he's a likable guy."

"But is he lovable?" Rose asked.

"They've been on one date, Rose," Scorpius laughed, "Not like she's in love with him."

"Yet," Arizona added with a sultry smile.

Iris rolled her eyes, smiling. No, she wasn't in love with him after one date - but could she potentially see a relationship with him? Why not?

"What do you think, Al?" she asked her best friend who seemed a little out of it.

"Of Zach Mason?" he clarified, and she nodded, "I think he's rather dull."

"How is he dull?"

"He just is."

"That's not a reason."

"It's good enough for me."

"Well it isn't for me."

"Good for you."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

"C'mon, Al," Scorpius intervened the staring match Albus and Iris were having, "Let's go. We'll see you all tomorrow."

After they had bid their goodbyes and the two Slytherins had left the Gryffindor common room, the three girls headed up to Rose and Arizona's dorm whom they shared with three other Gryffindor sixth year girls who weren't present at the moment. They conversed about what had just happened. Iris couldn't understand why Albus had reacted so strangely - Arizona and Rose thought he was jealous, but Iris shook that off and told them that he was probably just being an overprotective brotherly type, like he was with Lily that morning.

The thing was, was that she never really told Albus about her romantic or sexual life. If he had asked, then yes; she'd tell him whatever he wanted to know but it just never came up in conversation. However she didn't know how he hadn't heard of it all through the rumour mill - a secret never stayed a secret in Hogwarts. Another thing was that she kind of didn't want to tell Albus any of it - she didn't want something like this happening because she trusted Albus' judgement as if it were her own and if he didn't like someone, she tended to rethink what she thought about that person. It wasn't as though she let him cloud her own judgement, she merely liked having another persons opinion when it came to her own impressions of people - like with boys, she usually went to Arizona and sometimes Rose. To be perfectly honest, she didn't go to Albus with boys because she was scared he'd think less of her because of her choices - which was moronic because she knew Albus wasn't like that, and yet his actions earlier said otherwise.

She and Albus rarely fought, which was one of the things that made their friendship easy and when they did fight, it wasn't a great feeling. And so, Iris made a pact with herself that she would make up with Albus first thing in the morning when she saw him. Hell would freeze over before they fought because of a boy.


	5. Chapter Three

_/_ _ **an:**_ _so if anyone wants to know what I think Zach Mason would look like, I'd say Jordan Fisher, also I've decided that Fridays will be my update day because of school and exam time closing in and of course, education is my top priority and I have nothing on Fridays or Saturdays so I can stay up late after revision to write and then have a lie in on the next day c:_

 _ **gr8rockstarrox:** I did contemplate putting Iris in Slytherin but I think she has that classic boisterous Gryffindor trait that won me over  & you'll have to wait and see c; _

_**Maya Poltergeist:** thank you for your comment, hearing feedback is one of the most helpful things  & I have a friend exactly like how I've portrayed Al and I couldn't help but write him exactly like my friend and it sort of fits the situation and plot and how everything should fit together in the end c: /_

* * *

 _/ **trigger warnings:** obscene language (as per usual, sorry!) and spoilers for _ The Mayor of Casterbridge _by Thomas Hardy /_

 **Chapter Three**

The next day, Iris and Albus had spoken and made up; he had apologised for how he reacted and was sure that Zach was a nice enough boy for her and that he shouldn't have said anything without knowing anything about him and Iris had accepted and forgave - that didn't stop Albus from being a mopey bloke whenever he saw his best friend and the boy that she was now dating together.

Zach and Iris had grown closer over the past week and ever since then, they had already been on an official date - not including their spur of the moment one -, took walks around the castle and studied in the library together. Sometimes even, Iris had come and sat with the Ravenclaws at meal times instead of the Gryffindor table or the Slytherin with Albus. Despite this, Iris still managed to spend equal amounts of time with her best friend as she did before she had started dating Zach - like she did with any boy she had dated in the past - and yet, this was the first time Albus had noticed seeming as it had to be pointed out to him that she was active with dating and now he couldn't help but notice whenever her presence wasn't around.

Rose noticed his sudden sulkiness whenever he saw Iris with Zach and she had acted rather quickly - she mentioned how Iris would never dump Albus metaphorically and of course, he didn't understand the metaphor.

"You know," Rose had begun to explain, "Sometimes when people date, they begin to ignore their friends - subconsciously, of course - but it happens. Except, Iris would never do that to you, Al - she loves you too much - and she hasn't done that to you. I mean, she spends just the same amount of time with you as she usually does and doesn't even sit with Zach in classes _at all_ , she sits with _you_. So please stop brooding, it's rather irritating when you're being such a Debbie Downer."

Okay, so maybe she left him on a not-so-positive note, but he needed to get himself together - maybe try and make Iris jealous by dating someone else? Well, _else_ implied that he had dated someone before, but Al had never dated anyone - she wasn't even sure if he'd even kissed anyone in a drunken stupor in one of those wild parties held in the Room of Requirement. Wait - had Al ever even been drunk? And not like _Oh I've had one butterbeer and that's enough to get me buzzed!_ drunk, but _I'm so fucking pissed that I don't even remember the alphabet and I'm about to strip for the Hell of it after puking out the window onto the school grounds but it's okay because I won't remember it in the morning!_ drunk. Oh Al, do you not have a social life? Rose had thought to herself at the time and was glad that the Halloween Party would be happening soon. But then she had thought that maybe she'd got too caught up in _Operation Make Selouisus Happen_ as she had realised halfway through her thoughts that dating someone to make someone jealous wasn't exactly morally right so she refrained from telling Al to do that.

Maybe it was a good thing that James had called a meeting of the instigators for the plan before classes had begun that Monday on Halloween.

"Right lads," James began as the Scamander twins had arrived, "Where are we at? Malfoy, you go first seeming as you're Al's best mate - though I don't understand why because you're a right cu-"

"He's been moping ever since Iris has been going out with Zachariah Mason," Scorpius had cut him off with a statement paired with a glare, "It's clear he's jealous but he denies the jealousy and claims it to be him being an 'overprotective brother' which is obviously Hippogriff shit - though I'm not sure he even knows it himself."

"'Course he doesn't know it himself," Arizona had appeared despite the fact that she had left the first meeting with no intentions to be a part of this like the rest of Posleymalderson, "He's the densest fellow to grace this earth." She sat down next to Rose and smiled - the prior tension between the two Ravenclaws had mostly disappeared ever since that day a week ago where Rose had explained everything to Arizona and they had agreed to work together without the gambling. Regardless of this, they were still just as competitive in classes but instead of staking out each other's revision tactics, they shared them and studied together and as a result, both of their grades soared even higher than they had already been receiving - still equal, though!

"Well look who's come running back to ol' Jamesy," James smiled toothily, hands on his hips and a mischievous glint in his bright brown eyes, "Ickle Ari - you wanna explain how in the name of Merlin's soggy pants did a hyperactive adolescent like Iris end up with a dull bloke such as Zachariah Mason?"

"I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than _come running back to ol' Jamesy_ ," Arizona mimicked with a snarky smile on her face as Roxanne and Lucy sniggered at her impression of their older cousin, "and as for Zach, I set them up." Arizona shrugged casually.

Roxanne and Lucy instantly stopped laughing; "And you'd do that _why_?" Roxanne had asked - apparently denseness ran in the family, Arizona thought to herself.

"Isn't obvious, Roxy?" Rose asked as the two Slytherins shook their heads and Rose rolled her eyes, "To make him jealous - and it's working; thanks to Arizona."

"Thought you didn't want any part of this?" Lucy narrowed her eyes playfully at Arizona who only shrugged again.

"I want my sister to be happy and she'd be happy with Albus."

"Can I just take a minute to point out that Lily isn't here?" Lysander - who was in Lily's house of Hufflepuff mentioned. For the first time, everyone had noticed the lack of Potter presence in the room bar James.

"She's probably with _Lucien_ ," Roxanne spat her ex's last name with such a poisonous tone that Rose could practically feel the white hot rage that Roxanne was emitting. "She's constantly with him - she's dumped her mates, her grades, her bloody priorities and now her _family_. That girl needs a bloody _Kyle Lucien Intervention_."

The conversation suddenly became about the fact that Lily was throwing her life away for a boy who was expected to have dumped her by now. Lysander and Lorcan - both of whom were fourth years like Lily and Lysander being in the same house - had noted that she had been skipping classes this past week and that Polly Youth and Ella Wiley (James' mate, Sam's younger sister, and yes their parents had called them Sam and Ella - _salmonella_ , really?), two of Lily's closest friends, had been seriously worried about her recently saying she had been making plans with them and constantly blowing them off. And as a result to the skiving off classes, Lily's grades had suffered and she seemed not to give half a shit and shrugged it off - she had lost all sense of priorities and now she wasn't even showing up for things that her _older brother_ had asked her to come to. If she was going to blow off her own family, Posleymalderson (minus Al and Iris, though everyone was sure that they'd take part in this) decided that they'd all talk to Lily sooner or later.

Ideas swam around the room on how to approach the subject with Lily but then they started questioning why Kyle Lucien hadn't done his usual sleazing then leaving. Hugo suggested that maybe, just maybe, Lucien had fallen for Lily to which Scorpius had called him a complete moron and if he was going to say something stupid it was best he not speak at all. James had told Scorpius to shut his fat mouth and Rose chastised the two of them as they began arguing and nearly yelled that this was meant to be about Lily and not them. And then Arizona spoke up and reminded everyone that, technically, this was meant to be about Iris and Albus. But their time had run out and classes were about to begin, so they had up and left without solving a single thing - classic Posleymalderson, that was.

"Where were you at breakfast, Al?" Iris asked Albus as he sat down next to her in Muggle Studies. It wasn't as though Albus really needed the subject - he knew a fair bit about the Muggle World seeming as his dad had practically grown up in it and he refused to rely on magic for every single thing, it was the same with his Aunt Hermione. Similar to Albus, Iris wasn't an alien to the Muggle World - her father was a muggle and her mother was a witch. Duke Jackson insisted that his two girls go to a muggle primary school before Hogwarts, wanting them to be well-versed in muggle literature, mathematics and science - well, what they taught of that in primary school. Fay Jackson couldn't help but agree; what with being a pureblood, she hadn't grown up knowing a lot about muggles and wanted her daughters to have the best of both worlds. So here they were, Iris and Albus, sitting in the Muggle Studies classroom waiting for Professor Layton to arrive - she was usually late.

"Scorpius usually wakes me up," Albus mumbled whilst taking out the book they had been studying for the past two months - _The Mayor of Casterbridge_ by Thomas Hardy - before adding, "I don't know where the bloody Hell he was this morning, but _I didn't even get enough time to eat_!"

"Oh the horror," Iris laughed dramatically before glancing at his dishevelled hair and patting it down roughly.

"What are you doing?"

"Saving you from even more embarrassment - have you not noticed that your shirt is inside-out and your tie is tragically tied."

"What would I do without you, Iris?"

"Wither away, Al," she replied, placing a friendly hand on his shoulder, "You'd wither away, rather pathetically might I add."

Albus didn't have enough time to get another word in for Professor Layton had finally arrived; "Sorry, sixth years, ran into a bit of trouble - well, ran into a bit of wall seems to be a bit more accurate," she mentioned as she rubbed her reddish nose and the class laughed - despite being used to their professor's antics, they were still as funny as ever. "Now, get your books out, we'll be studying character psychology today," she continued, suddenly in Professor-mode as she liked to call it, "I trust that you've all read _and finished_ this book so Miss. Kendall, what's your view on Michael Henchard - the actual Mayor of Casterbridge?"

Olivia Kendall, a Slytherin whom Albus wasn't very acquainted with, instantly spewed a bunch of in-depth information that he had not grasped when reading the book himself.

"Well he's a bit self-destructive, isn't he?" the dark skinned girl began surely despite the question which was probably meant to be rhetorical so Albus refrained from answering so he didn't look like an idiot, "I mean, for twenty-one years, he doesn't have a relationship - except with Lucetta in a bout of weakness from being ill - which suggests that he has no need for any sexual or romantic relationships and he even says something rather misogynistic - _'These cursed women - there's not an inch of straight grain in 'em.'_ And yet he constantly complains about the fact that he's lonely and that he's isolated within Casterbridge. We can sort of sympathise seeming as perhaps he didn't want to be with anyone since Susan, but even then he's something of a woman hater - which definitely contradicts our feelings of sympathy towards him."

"Very good," Professor Layton praised, glad that someone understood the book, "As Miss. Kendall mentioned, Henchard is self-destructive whether he knows it or not and his isolative ways are what leads him to push Donald Farfrae to stay in Casterbridge. Mr. Potter, would you care to elaborate on what you think of Farfrae?"

" _Not particularly, no_."

"What was that, Mr. Potter? Please speak up."

"I don't really like him, to be honest, Professor," Albus said the first thing that came to his mind, "He a bit of a snake to Henchard, he's a crowd pleaser and didn't treat Elizabeth-Jane very well. Everyone says he's meant to be the opposite of Henchard and I agree - Henchard sort of doesn't really notice that he has pretty crap judgement, Farfrae is right dickhead and he knows what he's doing."

"While your choice of language may not be accepted in the exam," Professor Layton laughed as Albus swore, something frequent and she had got used to it by now, "your answer is intriguing, go on."

"Well first of all," Albus began his rant, "when Farfrae came to Casterbridge, he and Henchard had a great bromance going and Henchard even told Farfrae about the fact that he sold Susan along with Elizabeth-Jane twenty-one years ago and then Farfrae eventually steals his job and business, and Lucetta and Elizabeth-Jane. Like we know he's smart - he proved that when he managed to save the damaged grain at the beginning of the book - so he knows what he wants and how to get it. I don't think for a second that he's the fun-loving happy-go-lucky character that everyone perceives him to be - he's a right old tosser who needs to stay in his lane."

"Bloody Hell, Al," Iris laughed at her best friend who had a frown on his face and his ears reddening as he noticed the class looking at him rather oddly seeming as he never got so worked up about fictional characters before. "What's got your wand in a knot? - And don't say it's Farfrae's manipulations."

In hindsight, Albus shouldn't have got so frustrated with Donald Farfrae, but he couldn't help but feel that he was only using that to vent his annoyance at Zach Mason for stealing Iris - maybe he was Donald Farfrae and Albus was Michael Henchard and next thing you know, Scorpius will be besties with him and James will start pissing him off in a way only brothers can. No; Albus was overthinking - he wasn't a character in a book written in bloody 1886 and Iris couldn't be stolen because she wasn't anybody's possession. And there was no way in Hell that James would ever start annoying Zach Mason - the bloke would probably shrug it off and James would get too bored too easily. Scorpius would not be able to be around such a dull person, he was simply too irritable and would get irritated by Zach's dullness. Godric, he was so dull. What did Iris see in him? Except for the fact that everyone loves him, he's not exactly _bad-looking_ and he's a Ravenclaw - he's got brains. Okay, Albus could see it somewhat, but that didn't mean he was going to cast aside his dislike for him.

The day went by rather slowly and perhaps that was because everyone was excited for the Halloween Feast and then the party in the Room of Requirement that became an annual thing when Teddy Lupin, who was in his fifth year at the time, decided that a feast just wasn't enough so he decided to set up a rave for the fifth years and up to get pissed and just have a whale of a time. Once he graduated, he handed down the legacy to Victoire who was going into her seventh year and once she had graduated, she gave the rights of hosting to Fred who was just beginning his fifth year. After Fred, graduated, he then bequeathed it onto James who had held it for the first time last year.

Last year, Iris and Albus had gone as Harley Quinn and the Joker - it was their first time in the infamous Halloween party reserved for the older students and they had the time of their lives. That is until Iris got so drunk that she did in fact forget the alphabet, threatened to strip for fun and then proceeded to puke out of a makeshift window that had appeared just in time - Albus held her hair out of her face. Well, her hair was in two bunches on opposite sides of head so he held those two. He didn't get drunk, he didn't really think he wanted to, so he automatically became the babysitter. But this year, Iris, Arizona and Rose had decided to do a joint costume as the Powerpuff Girls - Rose being Blossom (obviously!), Arizona as Buttercup and Iris as Bubbles. They wore simple A-line dresses that stopped just above mid-thigh with a black piece of ribbon around their waists, knee-high white socks and black high-heeled pumps. The only difference between them were the colours of their dresses - Rose in pink, Arizona in green and Iris in blue - and the fact that Rose wore a big red bow in her hair. Arizona charmed her hair to be a lot darker than it was as she was naturally blond and Iris shoved hers up similar to how she wore it last year but a lot neater as she wasn't going as a psychopath. Their makeup was simple - a light dusting of eyeshadow that was the colour of their dresses with thick eyeliner and mascara and all three wore the same light pink lip colour.

Iris was glad that her sister and Rose were getting along - how it had taken this long for them to finally become friends, she didn't know. That reminded her; she needed to give Al three knuts as last year during OWL season, they had bet on when the two stress-heads would forget the fact that they were rivals and friend up - Albus had bet before school ended and Iris had bet that they would after graduation. Oh how wrong she was. Speaking of Al, she had no clue what or who he and Scorpius were going as.

She hoped it wasn't something shit.


	6. Chapter Four

_/_ _ **an:**_ _okay so I felt like updating today because I've spent the majority of the past three days revising and now I suddenly feel inspired so I might as well not waste this c: also, if you wanna know what Kyle Lucien looks like in my head, I sort of see Michael Trevino !_

 _ **Anon:**_ _thank you so much! :D_

 _ **Maya Poltergeist:**_ _I feel like their costumes are quite banterous aha, Al drunk is something you might have very soon :D_

 _ **gr8rockstarrox:**_ _the class is Muggle Studies, and I don't really know how that class is run in canon Hogwarts so I've sort of put my own spin on it where they learn about a piece of literature each year so the bit from the last chapter is sort of from a module of their NEWT course. Aw ik bless Lily, she'll sort her life out soon! omg Al as Mojojojo would be great, I'm sad that I've planned something else now aha :D /_

* * *

 **Chapter Four**

It wasn't shit; it was basic, involved practically no creativity nor imagination and yet it was genius.

Albus and Scorpius had gone as their fathers; Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. Albus had transfigured the Slytherin crest and green lining of his robes into ones of Gryffindor and his tie too. Perfectly rounded glasses on his face, Al was the spit of his father. Scorpius, however, had merely slicked his hair back with gel and he was done; a mirror image of his father. For the night, the two had decided to 'hate' and call each other by their last names; much like how Harry and Draco still did.

"You two are moronic," Rose rolled her eyes at her cousin and his best friend. The five - Iris, Rose, Arizona, Albus and Scorpius - had decided to meet up before going to the Room of Requirement so they could all walk together.

"You dare insult me, _Weaselbee_?" Scorpius sneered, committing to the act, "Wait until my fath-" He then proceeded to burst into laughter; "I'm sorry, I actually can't get those words out of my mouth."

"Did your dad actually used to say that?" Arizona quirked her brow at him.

"According to dad and Uncle Ron, yes," Albus laughed along with Scorpius.

"No offence, _Draco_ ," Iris chuckled, "but that's rather pathetic."

"Oh, none taken," he replied with a grin, "You tell no lies there, Iris. Also, can I just ask; what the bloody Hell _are_ you three?"

" _The Powerpuff Girls_ ," all three girls chorused.

"Sugar," Iris started.

"Spice," Arizona continued.

"And everything nice," Rose finished.

"Also Chemical X," Iris reminded the two others and they nodded knowingly.

"You know what would've been hilarious?" Arizona smiled slyly as Rose and Iris gave her quizzical looks, "If Scorpius and Albus had gone as Mojojojo and Professor Utonium."

As the three girls cracked up, Al and Scorp looked at each other with utter looks of horror on their faces and sped ahead of them. Albus knew exactly what _The Powerpuff Girls_ were - and secretly, he loved it - but Scorpius had no idea, and so he merely ignored them and continued on with Albus.

Once the five had arrived, the party was already in full swing. James had really outdone himself; it was much wilder than last year. Streamers of black, white and gold hung from the ceiling along with floating jack-o'-lanterns. Coolers filled with drinks like non-alcoholic beverages such as water, mocktails etc. to alcoholic ones from butterbeer to firewhiskey and every muggle alcohol you could think of were spread around the large room. It was rather dark - lights hanging off of the walls dimly, changing colour every few minutes. Speakers seemed to have been installed into the walls and weren't actually connected to any stereo or music source - it was as though the music merely seemed to reverberate off the walls. The beauty of magic, eh? People danced in the middle of the room - the dancing styles ranged from flailing arms alone to swaying slowly to practically dry humping. Sofas were placed in the corners of the room so that party-goers could maybe chill, hang out, pass out or (once again), dry hump. The costume turnout was amazing; a group of seventh years had decided to go as infamous Hogwarts professors - Sam Wiley was clearly Albus Dumbledore and James had even gone so far as to go as their now-retired Headmistress and Transfiguration Professor; Professor McGonagall, and ordered everyone to call him Minnie or not at all.

Lucy and Roxanne, (who were experiencing the Hogwarts Halloween Horde for the first time seeming as they were fifth years), had gone as Lydia Martin and Allison Argent from a famous TV show called _Teen Wolf_ that they were obsessed with. The two greeted _Bubbles, Blossom, Buttercup, Harry_ and _Draco_ with open arms and bottles of vodka. The five soon split to say hi to other friends and get drunk.

Albus had never been fully drunk before - he'd had a few butterbeers to the point where he felt lightheaded and happy, but never to the point of not knowing what he was doing with his life; but that was going to change. He quickly downed the vodka and coke that he had mixed and poured himself another and another and ...

Meanwhile, Iris and Arizona had found each other and were sitting in the chill zone where it was suddenly less loud - probably so that people could actually communicate without flailing limbs and screaming at the top of their lungs.

"Why have we suddenly become so much closer these past few weeks, Ari?" a slightly tipsy Iris asked her sister, a bottle of tequila firmly gripped in her hands as she took a swig. "I mean, we're twins so we're, like, _meant_ to be close - but, like, we never have and now we're doing joint costumes for Halloween?"

"I had an epiphany, my dear sister," Arizona shrugged her arm sloppily over Iris' shoulders, "I want you to be the happiest you can be - and I hope you're the same for me; we are twins after all - and we should be there for each other to make that shit happen, you know?"

"That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me," Iris looked at her sister with tears in her eyes - when drunk, she tended to get overemotional; or would it be considered simply emotional seeming as she wasn't exactly a hugely feelings-y person when sober? " _But,_ like, are you sure it's not because you have a crush on Al or Scor or Rose - I have noticed you two being suddenly friendly with each other recently."

Arizona laughed at Iris' playful accusatory stare and replied, "I don't have a crush on any one of your best friends."

"So that means you fancy _someone_ ," Iris pointed a finger and _boop_ 'd her sister on the nose with it, "Just not my inner circle - wow, that sounded so cultish. OH-EM-GEE ARI! We should form our own cult - just for twins; we can get Lysander and Lorcan to join."

"You're insane," Arizona burst into a fit of giggles.

Iris quickly joined in and they ceased to stop - that is until the two spotted James throwing a punch at someone who was dressed up as Han Solo. A certain ginger dressed as Princess Leia then began yelling at James. Turns out, Kyle Lucien decided to come and bring Lily along with him - despite being a fourth year. James then shrugged off his black _McGonagall_ robe revealing a lovely emerald dress, and wrapped Lily up in it - not only was she dressed as Leia, but was wearing the golden bikini from _Return of the Jedi_ and James was not happy. He had fantasies about that golden bikini and now he could only picture his little sister in it. There was also the fact that he could see a number of students already sexualising Lily, even thought she was only fourteen - he wasn't going to let his little sister be disrespected like that, not on his watch.

"Go back to your dorm, Lily," James ordered, "You're not allowed to be here." Quickly, Iris and Arizona closed in on her along with Rose, Scorpius, Lucy and Roxanne - Albus was still off somewhere getting so pissed that he hadn't even noticed the gathering.

"You can't tell me what to do, James," Lily crossed her arms under the cloak. Kyle had stood up and put his arm around her after he had nursed his bruised cheekbone and she leaned into him. "You're not dad. And anyway, there isn't a rule - Teddy invented this party years ago, things have changed - people my age get drunk sometimes, we like parties."

"You couldn't have waited _one_ more year?" Roxanne raised her brows and mimicked Lily by crossing her arms, "You just had to come with your _kind_ and _caring_ boyfriend, didn't you?"

"Oh get over it, Roxanne," Kyle chose to speak up, "You're so blinded by your hate for me that you can't actually see that I might just give a shit about someone else other than myself for once. And you're pissy because it wasn't you."

"You son of a-"

"He's ruining your life, Lil," Rose cut Lucy off with a sympathetic look in her eyes, "Lorcan and Lysander told us that you've been skipping classes and that you've been basically ignoring Polly and Ella - even Hugo's seen a change in you and he's your best friend. You're losing who you are for the benefit of someone else."

"Wait," Kyle let go of Lily to look directly at her, "You've been skipping classes to hang out with me?" Lily looked down guiltily and ashamedly. "You said you had free periods, Lily - _you can't skip school -_ not for me, not for anyone."

"Also have you ever heard the term _Ovaries before Brovaries_?" Iris snorted in her drunken daze. Scorpius choked on his drink as Rose elbowed him for laughing at Iris' comment and gave her a stern look.

"You mean; _you didn't force her_?" James was utterly shocked that Lily would do this on her own accord - she was usually so level-headed and made good choices. "I mean," he coughed as Rose turned her stern expression to James, "You didn't know about this?"

"No," Lily answered for her boyfriend, "he didn't. And it's not like I intentionally dumped Polly and Ella, it's just, I - well - I'm-"

"You're young and in love," Roxanne spoke up for the first time, "I know how you feel, Lil - I was in your exact position two years ago. But I saw sense because _he_ was out of my life." She sent a scathing look to Kyle before looking back at Lily with a much softer expression - empathy.

"Lily," Kyle turned Lily to him, "You can't change who you are for me - I genuinely, for the first time, feel like something's going right for me; you're changing me into a better person but it seems that I'm the opposite effect on you."

Lily had tears in her eyes, she knew exactly where this was going; "I get it," she said, her voice thick, "You're breaking up with me."

"It's for the best, Lil," he pulled her into a hug and kissed her forehead softly, "Maybe we can try again someday, okay?" Lily merely nodded her head.

Kyle then took Lily back to the Hufflepuff Common Room and then returned to the party to hang out with his mates - Posleymalderson more than hoped that he wouldn't end up getting with someone tonight.

"Well," James finally said after a few minutes, "Let's not let that be a mood dampener - let's get back to getting shitfaced!"

Everyone had split up now; Lucy was now snogging Sam Wiley up against a wall; Roxanne was dancing wildly with Isabelle Weydon, Arizona's friend; James had now spotted his best mate and cousin, he proceeded to grab Sam and headlock him until he promised never to touch another member of his family like that ever again; Scorpius and Rose were having a gossip about the fact that Jessica Hayes was currently cheating on Elliot Maine right in front of his face and he _seemed_ to not care less; Iris and Zach - who was dressed up as Spider-Man and had lost his mask a while back when he was semi-sober - were somehow chatting, drinking, dancing and kissing at the same time; and Albus was currently screaming; "I AM THE CHOSEN ONE, BITCHES!" and playing drinking games with Olivia Kendall (from his house and Muggle Studies class) and her mates.

 _"I like to drink with Albus,"_ they sang, _"'cause Albus is my mate, and when I drink with Albus, he gets it down in EIGHT."_

Albus proceeded to down the bottle of straight vodka with ease.

 _"SEVEN! SIX!"_

He was completely gone; he would not remember this in the morning.

 _"FIVE! FOUR!"_

He then spotted Iris in the crowd of dancing sweaty students.

 _"THREE! TWO!"_

The vodka that was left was nearly non-existent as he drank and stared at his best friend and her dull boyfriend, Zach.

 _"ONE!"_

It was all gone when he noticed them kissing. Albus felt a surge of rage and grabbed the girl sitting next to her and kissed her - it was sloppy and wet; it was rather shit; he didn't even know who it was. Next thing you know, there were boos as Albus was ripped from the unknown girl. He looked to see who had grabbed him and saw his older brother who was nearly as drunk as himself.

"Albie!" James grinned and put an arm around Albus before slurring, "You're not supposed to snog stupid Reyna Gonzalez - you're supposed to snog Iris Jackson!"

"She has her dull boyfriend to snog," Albus mumbled incoherently, yet James still managed to hear him.

" _Nooooo!_ " James wailed with a woeful look on his face, "She's meant to be with _you_ \- not _dull Zach Mason_. You two are _goals_."

"No, James," Albus denied, shaking his head profusely as the two sat down on a sofa on the opposite side of the room as Scorpius and Rose, "she is happy with dull Zach Mason - she is happy therefore I am happy for her."

"Bu-But," James' brown eyes widened and stuck out his bottom lip - he looked purely innocent as he spoke, "Posleymalderson all want you together - we're trying to get you together and if you go snogging stupid Reyna Gonzalez and she's with dull Zach Mason then you ca- you can't get together and that's just so sad because you belong together. I mean, this all started because I was angry at the fact that you two bet on the fact that Effie from down the road back home would dump me and you were right - she dumped me, and I'm sad; but now I know that I'm doing this bec-because you should have what I couldn't, Al."

To be honest, Albus had absolutely no clue what James was on about. He may have _heard_ the words, but he hadn't consciously been _listening_ \- he was too busy staring at Iris laughing at something that dull Zach Mason said - she was probably humouring him because he's so fucking dull, Al thought to himself - and he couldn't help but notice how beautiful his best friend really was.

 _"Potter!"_

Scorpius had appeared, back in play with the whole Draco/Harry act, with a wand in his hand; most likely ready to mock-duel.

 _"Malfoy!"_

Albus' mind was dragged away from Iris as he stood up and whipped out a wand to fight back - of course they weren't actually using their own wands for they had predicted drunkenness thus bringing liquorice wands from Honeydukes instead.

As the two began play-duelling, Iris and Zach had found Arizona with Roxanne, Isabelle, Kathy, Sam and a few other students playing _Truth or Dare_. Before the pair had come, Kathy had admitted to having sex with Lyall Ives the day after he dumped Iris; Sam had done a belly shot on Isabelle who had got off with Eleanor Heart - a Hufflepuff in sixth year - and Arizona had told everyone that she fancied the pants off their Herbology professor, Neville Longbottom and had had sex dreams about him.

"Iris," Ieuan Dean, one of James and Sam's besties from Gryffindor, smiled shamelessly at her, "truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"What has been your most embarrassing and/or tragic moment of all time?" he asked.

"I'm going to need a stronger drink for this one," she laughed as Kathy handed her whiskey which she shot immediately. "My most tragic AND embarrassing moment began at the party that Ari and I hosted this past summer."

"Oooo, juicy," Sam commented, "That party was a such a rager, this is going to be _goooood_." he sang.

Arizona began cackling as she knew exactly where this was going - she had to keep downing drinks so that she could let her twin get on with the story.

"As everyone, apparently, knew," Iris began with a knowing smile, "me and Uriah Reese - who had just graduated - were ... let's just say; _involved_. Well, he, like everyone else, came to a party we were hosting because we had a free house. So as we did, Uriah and I soon got drunk together and started snogging which turned into more and so we went up to my bedroom. I don't know how long we were up there, but we were shagging and then ... my parents barged into my room. It shocked me so much that I twisted at an odd angle and really hurt Uriah - and I mean, really _really_ hurt. We had to go to the hospital with my parents after they'd kicked everyone out and the doctors told him he had a penile fracture. We had to tell them exactly how it had happened; that we were intoxicated; and then they called his parents who forced the story out of him. And let's just say his and my parents were less than happy. He never owled me again."

Iris' face turned beetroot as everyone roared at her story, but she then began laughing too - it was tragically funny.

Before Ieuan could ask Zach whether he wanted tell a truth or complete a dare, James ran over frantically - apparently Professor Longbottom was on his way to cut the party off as it was now two a.m. and although the professors knew about the parties held in the Room of Requirement, they gave them the curfew of half twelve. Everyone scarpered after downing their drinks, some getting that one last snog in (AKA Reyna Gonzalez trying to get off with Albus one more time before Scorpius practically had to drag him away), and Arizona muttering to herself, "Maybe now's my chance to make a move on him." as Kathy pulled her out of the Room of Requirement.

Unfortunately, some got caught - mostly Slytherins and Hufflepuffs trying to get to the lower parts of the castle, including Lucy, Roxanne and Eleanor Heart, though Scorpius and Albus managed to get back unscathed. James managed to guide himself, Iris, Sam and Ieuan back to Gryffindor Tower but Ieuan tripped over his dress - he was dressed up as Professor Layton, Muggle Studies - and she, ironically, was the one who caught him after he screamed; "GO ON WITHOUT ME. THINK OF ME AS A HERO." Rose, Arizona, Zach, Kathy, Isabelle and Kyle (who had, surprisingly, kept himself to himself for the rest of the night) got back to Ravenclaw Tower quite easily - their only issue was that all six of them were too drunk to even comprehend an answer to the riddle that was faced before them which got them all caught by their tiny Charms professor; Professor Flitwick. All who were caught were guided to their Common Rooms (although, all Flitwick had to do was answer a riddle) and had forty points per person taken away from their houses. Some, however, who'd been caught on many occasions out of bed after hours (like Ieuan, Roxanne and Lucy) had received detentions also.

James went to bed that night thinking he was missing something; what had he said to whom tonight? He had a feeling in his gut; he felt apprehension, like something bad was going to happen because of him. He soon fell asleep and all negative feelings were whisked away by a dreamless sleep thanks to the vast amount of alcohol in his system.

Unbeknownst to James, it was Albus that he told of Posleymalderson's plans to get him and Iris together. And although Albus didn't comprehend what his older brother had said earlier, didn't mean that it wouldn't arise from his subconscious later on.


	7. Chapter Five

_/ **an:** sorry for not updating last night, i had so much work to do that by the time i was free, the exhaustion kicked in and i fell asleep! Also, in this chapter, you sort of have a first person pov from Al towards the end in italics - but those are his thoughts!_

 _ **Anon:** i'm glad you find it interesting c:_

 _ **gr8rockstarrox:** i do have plans for Lily and Kyle, but you will have to wait and see c;_

 _ **Maya Poltergeist:** you will see jealous Iris sooner or later, i'm just not sure when - but she will be present in later chapters c: /_

* * *

 _/ **tw:** obscene language /_

 **Chapter Five**

Everyone had woken up with hangovers - especially Albus who was in utter agony for he had never experienced this before and was completely alien to the state he was in.

He virtually remembered nothing - except an abnormally odd conversation with his older brother, James. Al couldn't remember specifics; just that James did something when he was angry at the fact that he and Iris had predicted that Effie from down the road back home was going to dump him. What irked Al was that he had absolutely no clue what James had done. And he was going to find out, raging hangover or not.

Scorpius was so hungover that he reverted back into his first year self - rude to everyone and anyone (as per usual), but with his throbbing headache and sore eyeballs, he was even enacting this behaviour onto his friends.

Arizona and Rose had both woken up in their Ravenclaw dorm feeling the need to vomit. The two battled for the bathroom and Rose had been victorious in reaching the toilet first. Arizona proceeded to throw up in the bath. This had lasted a full thirteen minutes and twenty-seven seconds.

Everyone had woken up with hangovers ... well - except Iris. Despite being tipsy, she hadn't had that much to drink to experience the pain and chuck ups that hangovers brought. So when she had been perfectly fine the next morning at lunch (she had slept in like the majority of fifth years and up, regardless) no one could stand to be around her for she was envied because of her sobriety.

"How the Hell do you not feel like utter shit?"

Iris had sat down at the Slytherin table where Albus and Scorpius were sitting. Both of whom had nothing on their plates - they feared that whatever they forced down themselves would just flow back up without a second thought. Iris piled on whatever she could find; she was usually hungry the morning after parties.

"Because, Al," Iris gave him a sly smile as his voice, for once, didn't echo around the entire Great Hall, "I wasn't so pissed that I snogged Reyna Gonzales."

Albus shot up, instantly moaning as vertigo kicked in and stars twinkled before him instead of Scorpius who was still lying down on the table - Al was pretty sure he'd fallen back asleep, to be honest.

"You saw that?" his voice was filled with alarm. Of course, he didn't really care that she saw that he was kissing someone - no, it's just the fact that it was Reyna Gonzales! Of course he didn't care that Iris saw him kiss a girl. A girl that wasn't her. A girl that Iris hated profusely. So he did too. No, he didn't care...

"The whole party saw it," Scorpius spoke up, slowly picking his head off of the table to reveal his pale skin, dishevelled hair and purple circles under his currently-dull grey eyes. "It was horrendous to watch."

"Then why did you?" Iris snorted.

"Why did _you_?" Scorpius countered with an expression that was rather close to a glare. Iris could tell he was not in the mood - it was the same after every party with Scorp; you had to put up with his mood until he felt healthy.

"Because it was funny," Iris shrugged, shovelling chips into her mouth. She swallowed before saying, "Funny, but tragic. It was tragically funny."

"I'm going to take a guess and say that you're talking about Albus' kiss with Reyna?" Zach had arrived and sat down next to Iris with a laugh. He kissed her temple and wrapped his arm around her waist, "Iris is right, it was tragically funny."

"And _you_ get to have a say _because_?" Scorpius, who was now glaring at Zach, asked with such malice.

"I was just-"

"Yeah, well, don't," Albus added with a roll of the eyes - which hurt more than it should have.

"Don't be such dickheads," Iris chastised, "Being ill doesn't give you a free pass to project your moody asses onto other people. You can do it to me - I can take it - but do _not_ do it to my boyfriend. Come on, Zach."

Iris and Zach left to sit at the Ravenclaw table where Rose and Arizona were feeling a lot better once they got food in their stomachs. Rose took notice of Iris' dampened mood and had asked what happened. Iris gave her and Arizona, along with Kathy and Isabelle, about how her two best friends snapped at Zach. Rose proceeded to defend the boys, saying that that was just how they were when hungover - despite the fact that this was Al's first hangover. Arizona, however, told them that Scorpius, Albus and Zach should have a scrap. Kathy told Iris to merely ignore them until they came to apologise and Isabelle added that they should say sorry to Zach too.

Meanwhile, Scorpius and Albus were having a bitch about Zach and how dull he was and that Iris should be with someone more fun. Scorpius suggested that Albus go out with her, but he merely shook his head profusely saying that if Iris was happy, then he was too - even though he had just had a bitching fest with his mate about said girl's boyfriend. This triggered a flashback from the night before - he had said the exact same thing to James, but why? Unfortunately, his thoughts were cut short by a certain Hispanic Slytherin whom he had hoped would not remember the incident from last night.

"Hi Albus," Reyna Gonzales chirped. Albus, technically, had nothing against Reyna - it was Iris that she didn't get along with. It wasn't like the two girls went out of their ways to hate each other, they simply didn't like each others' personalities and saw fit that they didn't spend any time with each other. "I was wondering if you'd like to go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend? I know it's a bit forward and all, seeming as we got off last night and we were both proper drunk but-"

"I'm going to stop you right there, Reyna," Albus cut her off, looking up at her from where he sat, "I don't like you like that, so please can we forget last night and I'm sorry but no."

"And you're in love with Iris," Reyna sighed, "I get it - but she's happy with Zach, maybe it's time you move on too; she did it easily enough. Don't listen to James; I know he thinks you and Iris are goals, but I've heard things around Slytherin with Lucy and Roxanne. I'll see you around, Albus."

Reyna had quickly left and sat with Olivia Kendall down the other end of the Slytherin table.

"Well that wasn't vague," Albus said, sarcasm dripping in his voice, "What do you think she meant about Lucy and Roxanne - and James."

"It's nothing, Al," Scorpius grumbled - no, he couldn't let Al's idiotic cousins ruin everything, he needed Al to ignore everything. But lately, his best friend had been questioning things, he'd been suspicious; it was completely out of character for Albus as he was usually the clueless one and Iris usually figured things out and yet, it was as though they'd swapped minds. "Just ignore her - she was probably just trying to make you talk to her more because she fancies you."

"Yeah," Albus trailed off. But he couldn't help it - he needed to know what Lucy and Roxanne were talking about and he needed to know why Reyna didn't want him listening to his _older brother_. Reyna's words echoed in his head and he felt a memory of last night surge - _"She's meant to be with_ you - _not_ dull Zach Mason. _You two are_ goals. _"_ James had said this. Why had James said this? He needed to know ... but not right now, because he felt like he was about to vomit.

Iris was thankful that the party happened on a Saturday and that they had time to heal on Sunday. Despite not feeling like crap, she was completely exhausted and after her late breakfast (lunch for the rest of the school who hadn't been drinking last night) she and Zach retreated to his dorm in Ravenclaw tower. And despite feeling completely exhausted, she was still a hormonal teenage girl. For the last twenty minutes, she and Zach had been kissing heatedly on his bed. It was bliss. That is until he suddenly stopped and sat up.

"Can I ask you something?" Zach asked, a small frown on his face as if he was questioning himself as to whether he wanted to ask this or not.

"Yeah sure," Iris replied, rather breathless as she also sat up and crossed her legs, "Go ahead."

"Does Albus fancy you?"

Iris groaned and fell back onto Zach's bed, "No, he doesn't. And can we please not bring that up ever again? _Please_?"

"I'm sorry," Zach shook his head, "I'm just being paranoid. It's just that, I've heard things around Hogwarts about you two for the past six years, and he's never dated anyone - I think Reyna was his first kiss - isn't that odd? And-"

"Zach, _seriously_?" Iris shot up and gave him a look of exhaustion. "Me and him have been _best friends_ since day one and people seem to think that a girl and a boy can't be as close as we are without there being any romantic or sexual tension - when there's _none_. People like gossip and if there is none, they _make shit up_. And the fact that he hasn't been into dating or anything like that is _his_ business and if he had any issues with anything, he would've told me. So please, _stop_."

"That sounded very rehearsed," he mumbled, trying to joke but Iris was having none of it.

"Because last year, I said it a million times," she ran a hand through her hair as she recalled the stressful five months of fifth year. Zach frowned, obviously not understanding so she continued; "You know Damon Kingsley? The Gryffindor in our year? Yeah, well, he and I dated from November to February and the most frequent conversation we had was about Al. He accused me of cheating on him with Al, told me I shouldn't be that close to a boy, ordered me to stay away from him - that was final straw. And I don't want that to end up being me and you."

"That's not going to be us," Zach manoeuvred himself so that instead of facing Iris, he was no beside her and enveloping her in his arms, "I was being unnecessarily jealous, and I know that now. Thanks for telling me about Damon Kingsley, though."

Iris simply sighed and let herself be bear-hugged by her boyfriend.

Later that day, Albus finally bucked up and asked Reyna what the Hell she was on about earlier at lunch. And even though Scorpius was right about the fact that Reyna fancied him and used this as an excuse to get him to come to her (not that he noticed), she still had valuable information.

"I don't know what it means but," Reyna began as the two were walking down to the Slytherin dungeons, "Does the word _Selouisus_ mean anything to you?"

"It sounds like a disease," Albus commented but he had no recollection so he shook his head when she gave him a pointed look.

"Well, Lucy and Roxanne talk about it all the time," Reyna continued, "I hear vaguely what they speak about because they always gossip on the sofa nearest to where I study. What I do know, is that it has something to do with you, Iris and Posleymalderson. And James is leading it."

"This sounds very much like a conspiracy theory, Reyna," Albus frowned as they turned the corner and were now standing in front of the Slytherin Common Room door.

"This is their prime time for gossip," Reyna turned so she and Al were now facing each other at eye level, "If you don't want to believe me, cast a Disillusionment Charm on yourself and have a front row seat. _Phineas Nigellus_."

The portrait hole opened and Reyna disappeared. As Albus followed, he glanced towards the sofas and saw Lucy and Roxy who were suddenly quiet as he entered and they spotted him. Giving them a bright smile, he continued up to his dorm. Disillusionment Charm? No; he had something _a lot_ better. Pulling out the watery material from the trunk underneath his bed, he grinned. _Thank you, dad._ he thought to himself. While James received the Marauder's Map and Lily had been gifted with their father's vintage Firebolt broomstick from 1994 that she treasured dearly, Harry Potter had given the Invisibility Cloak to Albus.

Slipping it over his head and making sure to cover up his feet, he slinked down the stairs and into the Common Room unnoticed. Taking a seat on a nearby wooden chair - not sitting in a sofa as he could make an impression and noise because of the black leather - he listened in on Lucy and Roxanne, who he could hear loud and clear.

"-I don't know, Luce," Roxanne shook her head, "Neville doesn't seem like Professor Layton's type. And besides, he's happy with Hannah - Layton wouldn't screw up a marriage."

"But have you seen the way she looks at him?" Lucy objected, "It's the exact same way Al looks at Iris."

 _Here we go._

"That reminds me," Roxanne frowned, "Have you told James yet?"

 _Told James what!?_

"No," Lucy shook her head, "I'm not sure whether I think they'll get together before or after Iris' birthday."

 _Get together? Wait, what?_

"She's in April, right?" Roxanne asked and continued as Lucy confirmed her question with a nod, "Al is too dense realise feelings, it'll definitely be after."

 _I'm not that- Okay, I am._

"But what if it's Iris?" Lucy suggested excitedly, picking up her legs and crossing them on the sofa, "What if she makes some huge declaration of love and he's so overwhelmed with the feelings that he thinks that aren't there but come rushing forward that he kisses her and it all happens before her birthday because she gets bored of dull Zach Mason and finally realises what's been in front of her all along?"

 _Stupid dull Zach Mason._

"Luce, we've been over every scenario possible," Roxanne groaned, "Can we please just make up our mind and tell James? Godric knows quickly it took the rest of Posleymalderson to choose their bet."

 _What bet? Why are they betting? And without Iris and i?_

"You know me, Rox," Lucy rolled her eyes, "I take forever to make up my mind - and anyway, Rose and Arizona aren't betting, they're just doing it because they think it's more _moral_ if they get them to start going out without the gambling."

 _Oh my, Godric._

"Maybe they're right," Roxanne shrugged, "I mean, it's one thing to manipulate people but to bet on the outcome as well?"

 _They're betting on Iris and I. And trying to get us together. To fall in love._

"I understand, Rox," she sighed and fell back onto the sofa. "I just hope James can put his galleons where his gob is."


End file.
